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Give the Borderlands movie “a chance”, as “a lot of people worked really hard on it”

Take-Two boss Strauss Zelnick would like you to give the new Borderlands movie “a chance” because “a lot of people worked really hard on it”.

Zelnick was asked about the film’s less-than-stellar early reviews during yesterday’s Q1 earnings call, and whilst he called the “look and the feel” of the movie “terrific”, Zelnick told IGN its performance “wouldn’t have a financial impact” on Take-Two or, indeed, the Borderlands franchise itself.

The ‘Borderlands’ Movie Debuts With A 0% On Rotten Tomatoes

The Borderlands movie has a flat 0% on Rotten Tomatoes.

‘Borderlands’ review: Cate Blanchett video game disaster is the worst movie of the year

No positive reviews whatsoever (Update: A single positive review has come in raising it to a 3%), and the ones that are in are not just negative, but brutal. Here’s a sampling:

  • Discussing Film: “The fans deserve a lot better than whatever director Eli Roth is trying to do with Borderlands. This is the video game movie curse at its worst.”
  • Men’s Journal: “If Borderlands doesn’t stop studio executives from salivating at the sight of every single IP that comes across their desks, nothing will.”
  • Next Best Picture: “It’s impressive how Roth can elicit the poor quality of 2000s video game adaptation energy yet somehow forget the discernable sense of fun or style that made even those terrible movies stand out.”
  • IGN: “Borderlands is an abysmal waste of a beloved franchise that takes a kooky band of murderous misfits and drains the life out of their first adventure together.”

he actress has no palpable connection to her ragtag, barely-alive ensemble, including Jamie Lee Curtis (another Oscar winner), Kevin Hart (an almost Oscar host) and funnyman Jack Black.

Not Blanchett’s fault, but she also dons an ugly bright red wig that might have been inspired by Dairy Queen soft-serve.

Everything about “Borderlands” is appalling: the acting, writing, direction, design. As the characters trudge through the sand on their hunt for the mysterious Vault, the desperate audience scours the screen for anything to enjoy — or, at the very least, understand. Our search proves fruitless.

Verdict

Borderlands is an abysmal waste of a beloved franchise that takes a kooky band of murderous misfits and drains the life out of their first adventure together.

Eli Roth is no James Gunn, and this film has none of the lovable lunatics, awe-striking sci-fi visuals, and out-of-this-world storytelling of Gunn’s Guardians of the Galaxy trilogy.

The hyper-stylized flair of the Borderlands games is replicated only on the most superficial level, and with a PG-13 rating, all the limb-severing gore, dirty-minded humor, and uniquely deranged themes are replaced by recycled blandness geared toward mass marketability.

It’s the worst-case-scenario Borderlands movie that goes against everything Borderlands stands for as a series – a miserable failure.